It's no secret if you have been doing life with me, the last month or so has been very weighty and in some ways left me feeling a bit defeated.

A week ago, I was just getting on the elliptical machine to do some cardio/relieve major stress. I'll be honest, I was fighting tears and thought this public place would be the best place to make me contain myself. Our apartment work out room looks straight over the pool and onto the hills of Nashville, which this Texas girl never takes for granted. It's just a lovely view! However, the sunlight was beaming right off the water and straight in my eyes, so I put on Phil Wickham, started moving my legs and closed my eyes.

The song that began to play was Tears of Joy off of his new album The Ascension. Now I'm going to pause and do a sales pitch. Get this album! It has encouraged my spirit immensely. So do it.now.

"Let my last breath here
Be my first with You
Where You rob my fear
And You make me new
So whatever comes
Whatever I go through
Let my last breath here
Be my first with You"

I honestly didn't focus on the rest of the song, don't even remember hearing it. Because at that moment, in all of my doubt, concern, stress, feelings of defeat- this is what my ears needed, it's what my heart ached for. I needed a reminder that He would rob my fears and all of the other emotion that made me heavy; ultimately He could and would fulfill me. Not a career, not being financially stable, not being able to be with sick family members, not the feeling of success or the lack of feeling like I've failed. Just Him. In all His goodness and the love I know God has for me. That was it.

It just captivated me. Enough so, that true to Brittany-fashion, I began to tear up as I'm trying to follow the instructions this elliptical machine is throwing at me. Instantly I felt this overwhelming joy. Also I kept checking to make sure no one was going to walk in and think I couldn't handle this workout, which might not be far form truth. :) But in that moment, I felt so much joy as I closed my eyes and had this sweet moment of relief from God.